Chapter 8 – 3 Reasons to be Polite – Kids’ Discussion

First a Little Fun About Birthdays

Harry Potter gets to go to a Death Day party in this chapter. What did you think of the party? It made our family think about the many birthday songs that we have heard sung at parties. There is the traditional “Happy birthday to you,” song. Have you ever heard this one?

Happy birthday to you,
You live in a zoo,
You look like a monkey,
And you smell like one too.

Here’s another version that we have heard. We only sing this one with and to close family friends that know that we’re being silly and can take a joke.

Happy birthday,
Happy birthday,
Sin and sickness in the air,
People dying everywhere,
Why were you born?
Why were you born?

We also have a song that our family created and is sung to the birthday person before they get out of bed in the morning. We actually have a blog that contains a video of the song. Click the banner below to see us in action. Here are the words to the song:

Happy, happy birthday,
From all of us to you.
Happy, happy birthday,
Because we all love you.
Happy, happy birthday,
Don’t think that we’re rude.
Happy, happy birthday,
Because we’re all gonna pile on you.

Do you know any other birthday songs?

Why go to a Death Day Party?

The interesting part we find about this chapter was the choice that Harry made. Harry and his friends could have had fun at the party in the Great Hall with the rest of the school. It sounded like there was going to be delicious food and a lot of fun. However, Harry, Ron and Hermione choose to go to Nearly Headless Nick’s death day party. The death day party was designed for ghosts to have an great evening. The party wasn’t made for living humans to enjoy. Why would Harry and company choose to a party for ghosts when they could have a better time at a party more suited for them? Also, the three never complained about the horrible food or cold temperature of the party during the evening. Why?

Harry and his friends were being polite. That’s a word that you hear adults throw around all the time.

• Be polite.
• Don’t say that word; it’s not polite.
• Be polite and say, ‘Thank you.’
• Don’t chew with your mouth open; it’s not polite.
• Thank you for holding the door open – that was very polite of you.

What Does it Mean to be Polite?

After much debate and discussion, our family decided that being polite is when you show someone else that their needs, wishes or wants are more important than your own. It means that you’re thinking of other people before yourself.

Why Should You Be Polite?

1. Avoid Hurt Feelings
   At the death day party Ron was getting grossed out by all the rotting food. All three of the friends were also freezing in the cold temperatures of the room. However, they didn’t say a word to Nicholas or the other ghosts. Imagine if they had told Nicholas that the party he worked hard on to create was disgusting, gross and just wrong. I think Nicholas might be crushed. It would basically be telling him that something that he was so proud of was ridiculous. Sometimes people like foods that we think are gross. They might enjoy video games that we think are childish. Why would you want to hurt someone’s feelings about something they treasure when there is nothing morally wrong with it?
2. Make Others Feel Important
   In this chapter Harry could have told Sir Nicholas that he REALLY wanted to go to the school party. Even the Nicholas thought that Harry wouldn’t want to go to the death day party. Harry chose to go to Nicholas’ party because it made Nicholas feel important. Nicholas knew that Harry was giving up something to come to the death day party. Sometimes in a family or in friendships we can choose to sacrifice something we want for something another person wants. One day I, Darren, gave up watching a movie I wanted to see so that I could go play basketball with my son. I HATE basketball but my son really wanted to play. I was happy that I made him feel important and our relationship is stronger because of my decision.
3. It’s The Golden Rule
   Treat others the way you, yourself, want to be treated.
   My older sons used to tell me all the time that this was the best rule for friends and family. It’s just a good quick rule that will help you treat others fairly and nicely. It’s a rule that will help you keep your friendships and more than likely grow them deeper. Before you carry out an action with someone, it’s good to check the action against this rule.
   • Should I crank the volume on the TV while I watch cartoons in the morning when everyone else is still in bed sleeping?
   • Should I clean up the board game that is all over the floor when I didn’t get the game out?
   • Should I play with the unpopular girl/boy on the playground if I know people might make fun of both of us?

Now It’s Your Turn:

Gary invited everyone in your class to his house for his birthday party. Gary isn’t very popular. In fact most of your friends think he’s a dork. His family also doesn’t have a lot of money, so you know that the party is going to be simple. More than likely all the kids will go over to his backyard to play outside games like tag and hide-and-go-seek, and then you will enjoy a cake that his mom baked. Many of the kids in your class including you tell Gary’s family they’ll be attending his party, and Gary’s family is expecting most of your class to attend.

The week before his party a girl in your class named Sally announces that her family just bought a go-kart track and her parents will let everyone from her class come to the track this weekend for FREE. Everyone that comes will also get FREE pizza and ice cream. A lot of your friends have decided that they won’t go to Gary’s party so that they can go to the go-kart track.

1. Which do you WANT to go to? Why?
2. What is the polite thing to do? Why?
3. How do you think Gary feels about so many people canceling?

Kids’ Discussions:

Ch. 01 | Ch. 02 | Ch. 03 | Ch. 04 | Ch. 05 | Ch. 06 | Ch. 07 | Ch. 08 | Ch. 09 | Ch. 10 | Ch. 11 | Ch. 12 | 

Parent Discussions: 

Ch. 01 | Ch. 02 | Ch. 03 | Ch. 04