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transfiguring-adoption-three-hoot-book-review

Transfiguring Adoption awarded this movie 3 Hoots out of 5 based on how useful it will be for a foster/adoptive family. [Learn more about our Hoot grading system here]


Movie Info:

  • Rating: PG-13 (Violence, Sequences of Action)
  • Genre: Adventure, Action, Fantasy
  • Runtime: 151 minutes
  • Studio: DC Extended Universe/Warner Bros.

From the Cover of Wonder Woman 1984 (2020) by DC Extended Universe and Warner Bros.:

“Diana Prince lives quietly among mortals in the vibrant, sleek 1980s — an era of excess driven by the pursuit of having it all. Though she’s come into her full powers, she maintains a low profile by curating ancient artifacts, and only performing heroic acts incognito. But soon, Diana will have to muster all of her strength, wisdom and courage as she finds herself squaring off against Maxwell Lord and the Cheetah, a villainess who possesses superhuman strength and agility.”


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Transfiguring Adoption’s Overview:

The target audience appears to be children ages 13 and up. This is in part due to how long the film is but also due to some intense action sequences, violence, and at least one instance of foul language. This movie would be best for pretty much any family with children of this age who enjoy superhero movies.

While this movie does not necessarily address foster care or adoption, caregivers can note themes about change, truth, and growth throughout the film that can be valuable to a growing teen who is still learning who they are and what their identity (and legacy) will become, much like Diana’s struggle to grow as a hero.


** Spoilers Could Be Ahead **


How Is This Relevant To Adoption & Foster Care?

While this movie is not specifically about foster care or adoption, Diana Prince certainly faces some intense grief and loss that children from the child welfare system may relate to. Diana’s anguish as she expresses having to sacrifice so much for others in her goodbye to Steve Trevor hit my heart so much. How many of our kids would jump at the chance for one wish? One desire to be reunited with a loved one or to feel powerful and in control of their own life? For this reason there are several discussion points that can help you work through tough subjects surrounding grief, loss, and transition with your teenager and help them feel just a little bit less alone as they walk through those very difficult emotions.


Discussion Points:

  • The Grief of Change
    Children who have endured trauma and have entered the child welfare system know the relationship well between grief and change. They may not have the vocabulary for this but the themes are the same… When things change, there is loss. Where there is loss, there is a time of grief for what was or what could have been. A child’s grief is hard for a caregiver. We foster and adopt because we love kids and don’t want them to suffer! But healing cannot happen unless we quietly accept a child’s pain and help them walk through it as a team.
  • Truth with a Capital T
    Have you ever noticed your child lies? Like, a lot? I’m talking about the time you said the sky was blue and your child defiantly insisted it was not. Or the time you watched them take a snack from the pantry only for them to insist it was their sister. And then there’s that time where they insisted their parents did not hurt them through their tears. Children who have endured trauma struggle with the truth. Because, in the past, truth caused pain. And when you have endured the pain of being torn from the familiar and comforting that is something to be intensely avoided. Caregivers can take Diana’s avoidance of the inevitable loss of Steve Trevor and Barbara’s resistance to relinquish power and charisma as examples of how difficult it can be for children to face Truth.
  • Growth in Identity and Legacy
    Like Diana when she first reunited with Steve Trevor, children do not want to think beyond the present. The past was scary enough, who wants to look at the abyss of the future? Between fear and childhood development disruptions it is very difficult for children who have endured trauma to envision the future, let alone plan and sacrifice for it. However, for Diana to regain her Amazonian strength and continue her path as a hero she needed to allow herself to face the truth, grieve, and move forward for a better future for herself and for those she vowed to protect. Just as heart-wrenching of a decision was to let go of Steve, imagine your child letting go of nearly everything they have ever known and the magnitude of these moments becomes much clearer. Children who have endured trauma certainly need to be guided through loss and grief but also be given hope for a future. Since our children cannot see these possibilities for themselves it is up to us as caregivers to help our child dream and think about the person they are today and will be tomorrow.

Cautionary Points:

  • Action Sequences with Unrealistic Stunts
    Granted, the Amazons are pretty much on par with gods and it’s made clear they are superhuman, but that may not stop your child from reenacting Diana’s daring Olympic feats or ridiculously cool armored-vehicle dogfight. Or fighting with Cheetah in the water. So please take note if your child struggles to distinguish reality from fantasy that this film should be approached with caution.
  • Violence
    Much of the film features Diana trying very hard not to cause lasting harm to others (even bad guys) but the same cannot be said for the villains. There is a significant amount of fantasy violence and realistic violence using weapons like guns. There are also sequences of fighting in water that could lead to drowning and a character being electrocuted. This may be triggering for children who have witnessed or endured violent situations with adults. This is due to their brains being set constantly on high alert and having trouble differentiating between actual danger and the high-stress fight scenes feeling like danger. Proceed with caution if your child has a history of witnessing or enduring violence from adults.
  •  Language
    There is one instance of the word “shit” being used in a funny exchange between Diana and Steve. This of course may be a concern if your child struggles with parroting movie lines that get a response but also may not be wanted in your home for a younger child at all.
  • War-Torn Scenes World-Wide
    For a child who had endured catastrophic damage to their home, this one may be a film to sit out on. Towards the end of the film Maxwell Lord appears to win in causing world-wide calamity and destruction with bomb sirens, scenes of cities across the world in shambles, and people desperately trying to get away to safety. These chaotic scenes may be triggering to children who have endured catastrophic events such as bombings and mass violence so proceed with caution if your child has endured such things.

Discussion Guide:

  1. Why does Diana miss Steve so much? Why hasn’t she tried another romantic relationship?
    Caregiver Note: Diana seems to have it all at the start of the film. She has a career where she is highly respected, she effortlessly fights crime to protect people in her community, and she looks amazing while doing all of the above. But, when she’s alone in her apartment it’s clear it’s a shrine to those she loves and has lost with pictures of her friends, her fellow soldiers, and her love Steve Trevor. It’s clear that Diana is still actively grieving for Steve even if she is not aware of it following his self-sacrifice in the War. Diana never had the chance to explore the relationship they could have had or even say good-bye so it’s understandable that she would still grieve deeply for these friends and especially Steve. Like Diana, kids who have endured trauma are grieving even when they don’t express it the way we would. It’s important for caregivers to be mindful of this and that grief can well up over and over until acceptance has been reached.
  2. When Diana had to relinquish her dream for Steve why did she react so emotionally?
    Caregiver Note: When Steve died initially Diana grieved for Steve and what they could have been together. And his sudden appearance gave them a chance for that future together. Diana said it herself, she sacrifices herself for others constantly so why can’t she have this one thing? Much like Diana, children who have endured trauma and have been in the child welfare system may repeatedly grieve when loss is made evident again. Every time a parent doesn’t call, a relative doesn’t make a visit, or the awareness that they won’t see their cat arises, our children grieve harder. Diana had a loving mother and mentor who taught her how to accept Truth and grieve, but our children have not all had those lessons so it is up to us as the caregiver to calmly and quietly accept our children’s pain, help them identify and sort it out, and move forward towards acceptance with our love and presence.
  3. How was Diana’s loss of Steve different this time from his death?
    Caregiver Note: Diana did not get a chance to say goodbye when Steve died. There was no preparation for the fact that Steve was going to die when he had to make the decision to sacrifice himself for the betterment of the world. Diana was faced with a similar dilemma, give up a future with Steve or allow the world to be lost. This time, Diana was able to really say goodbye and leave nothing unsaid. Wouldn’t our children love to have that same closure when they face the Truth of loss? For most of our kids though there won’t be a perfect goodbye. Caregivers can give the space for grief to come and go and allow a space safe for words of pain. When your child is grieving, we can think of Diana and the intense longing to leave nothing unsaid and have comfort and encouragement before entering back into battle.
  4. Why does Diana think the Truth is so important? Who taught her that?
    Caregiver Note: For Diana, Truth is an absolute value that is instilled in her at a young age by her mother and her mentor. Truth is a part of Diana’s identity and her culture. This is especially underlined in her use of the Lasso of Truth. The children in your home may have a similar relationship with Truth to Diana, but others may have a very different relationship with Truth because of their family of origin or because of values they learned to help in their survival. This question can help open up a discussion about how values are passed on through culture and family but how it is our own choice on how we act upon those values.
  5. Why are dreams so different from Truth?
    Caregiver Note: For Diana, having Steve back for a time was away to escape from pain and loneliness. It was a way to return not only back to what their relationship was but what it could have been. Much like Diana, many children struggle with accepting the truth because the truth can lead to heartbreak. Dreams may be what we want so desperately, but the Truth is what we have. “Pulling yourself up by your bootstraps” won’t change that your parents are lost in the abyss of addiction or mental illness. It won’t take away the pain of losing your pets, friends, teachers, and extended family. And it doesn’t erase the pain already experienced or to come in the future as new depths of loss are acknowledged. Caregivers need to be prepared for every time the Truth shows itself and your child can no longer deny the existence of what has happened to them as they will very much need a bigger, stronger, wiser person to accept their pain and walk through it as a team.
  6. Have you had a time where your dreams were different from the Truth? What was that like?
    Caregiver Note: For children who have endured trauma, dreams can look very different from the Truth they are living and have no control over. They didn’t pick to be born into their family of origin, but they long for them. They didn’t choose to be in foster care or removed from the family of origin but the powers that be have determined they cannot remain safely in the only home they may have ever known. Children who have endured trauma and/or have experience with the child welfare system experience this pain daily, whether they show it or not. Allow your child to lead this part of the conversation. They may or may not have the words for these experiences but giving your child a change to practice using their voice and to connect feelings to their behavior is a wonderful practice in mindfulness.
  7. How can I help you when the Truth feels too big?
    Caregiver Note: This is another question that will need to be led by your child. Sometimes the best thing a caregiver can do for their child is to just listen. We want so much to love children that sometimes we prevent children from discussing or processing hard emotions because we hate to see them in pain. However, this will only delay your child from being able to achieve acceptance. Allow your child to discuss ways they can be comforted and shown love. Remember, words only communicate so much of what we are saying to one another. Think of tones and body language as well while allowing your child to form their voice.
  8. What does Diana have going for her at the start of the movie? What did she lose by accepting her wish for Steve to return to her?
    Caregiver Note: At the start of the movie Diana Prince appears to have it all. She’s a powerful woman who is highly respected in her field. She effortlessly wears a presence that quietly commands respect and acknowledgement the way many women (like Barbara/Cheetah) wish for on top of being absolutely gorgeous and kind. Though she finds fulfillment in her work and heroism, she longs very much for what could have been with Steve. However, by accepting her wish for Steve, she loses much of the power she had before and had gained since fighting in the war. This question will allow your youth to connect some of the subtlety with what exactly Diana gave up with her wish.
  9. How did Diana refusing to relinquish her wish affect her present and potential future? How was Barbara (Cheetah) affected by her refusal to relinquish her wish?
    Caregiver Note: Diana not only is stunted by her refusal to let go of Steve but is diminished. Diana slowly is losing her physical strength and connections with who she is because her identity is so embedded with Truth specifically. Barbara gains the respect and power she craved as a shy, insecure young woman but loses her humanity (her ethics, respect for others, and empathy) in exchange for this easy source of strength. She loses the very essence of herself and is completely transformed internally, as well as physically when she wishes further to become an apex predator. This will also help your youth connect some subtle points to the film that may be difficult to pick up on between the fights.
  10. How did letting go of the past and potential future with Steve allow Diana to grow? How did not letting go of her wish damage Barbara’s future?
    Caregiver Note: By acknowledging the Truth and embracing the grief of loss Diana was able to not only regain lost strength and power but was able to gain more! Diana is able to achieve flight by incorporating the beautiful lessons learned in the time she did have with Steve and become even more powerful and versatile in battle than ever before. She goes through a complete transformation and is able to fully utilize her armor and weapons to push through and rescue others. However, in Barbara’s case she became more and more lost in her desires until she lost herself entirely. This can open up a conversation of how avoiding grief and only acknowledging dreams will not only hurt more later but have lifelong implications to achieving and growth in the future.

NOTE: Inclusion on these lists does not necessarily mean endorsement. Furthermore, with all our resources, we highly recommend you preview them first to determine if there are any trauma triggers that your child may not be ready to handle. Transfiguring Adoption does not intend for its reviewers nor its reviews to be professional, medical or legal advice. These reviews and discussion guides are intended to help parents to better be able to connect and understand their children who come from traumatic backgrounds.


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