An Adoptee Practices Time Management Skills?
Well, that’s hopeful thinking! But seriously, I know time management is a difficult thing for any busy family these days! Between work, school, scouts, band, pets, aging parents, church activities, housework, shopping, cooking, doctor’s appointments, etc, etc, etc…Sometimes I forget whether I am coming or going. Being a parent is hard work (well duh)!
I am not sure if it is like this for all adoptees, but for me, I still feel like I need to prove that I am worthy to be here since, you know, I was kind of a surprise to those who brought me into this world. I feel like I need to prove that they were wrong to reject me, so I often bite off more than I can chew.
This leads me to some wicked panic attacks and feelings of inadequacy when I become overwhelmed (overwhelmed? who has time for that?). So, in my continual efforts to improve myself, I think it is time I look at my issues here.
First of all, I need to do something I haven’t done in long time, and that is take care of myself. Often, when I have too much on my plate, I give up doing things that are beneficial to my health, such as exercising, and taking time to prepare nutritious meals. I often give up on sleep trying to make sure everything is ready for the next day. There have been many nights I have found myself putting a load of laundry away at 12:30 am. I don’t take time to relax very often, nor do I spend any time doing hobbies I enjoy. All of that right there can lead to quite a bit of anxiety.
Next, I need to prioritize the things I am doing. Obviously, making sure my family is taken care of spiritually, physically, and mentally is very high on my list, and I do love to volunteer, but sometimes, I need to say, “no”. Sure, my kids might feel upset that I am not going to stuff 150 gift bags or bake 5 dozen cupcakes for the school fundraiser, but if I don’t have time, I need to learn how to not feel guilty when I have to pass on those activities.
- Ask for Help
Last, I need to learn when to ask for help. There have been many times when I have looked at my house and seen a mountain of laundry, toys strewn all over the living room, a sink full of dishes, full garbage bins, empty dog bowls, toothpaste that somehow smeared itself all over the bathroom sink, a pile of unpaid bills, a mystery smell in the refrigerator, muddy footprints across the kitchen floor, little boy sprinkles on the toilet, dead plants from lack of watering, and who, just who, spilled glitter in my bed (?!), and totally lost it. Luckily, I have a husband who sends me to a time out before it gets too bad. Then, we come up with a plan, and a few hours later, all is well in my world. but truthfully, If I would have just asked for help (from both him and my children) in the first place, nuclear meltdown Betsy wouldn’t have reared her ugly face.
So, this is a beginning. I am not to the point where I can make schedules and have clear, concise, organized plans yet, but I will get there. Maybe I will even read a “how to” book about more time management ideas, I just need to put that on my “to do” list….