Transfiguring Adoption’s Overview:

Enola Holmes is a fun new twist on the Sherlock Holmes stories- this time starring his much younger sister who’s sleuthing skills rival his own. The movie is based on the YA book series by and stars Millie Bobbie Brown (Stranger Things) in the lead role along with other notable names including Henry Cavill (Sherlock), Sam Claflin (Mycroft) and Helena Bonham Carter (Eudoria). The movie is a lot of fun and very enjoyable to watch. Young girls will find a positive role model in the strong, smart, and independent Enola and the movie is set during the women’s suffrage movement in England and definitely has an important message about female empowerment woven into the story.

For Foster and Adoptive Families, it is important to note that while a fun movie, there are a few components that make it somewhat problematic and therefore caution is recommended.  The basic premise of the movie is that Enola’s mother, Eudoria, unexpectedly disappears on her 16^th birthday leaving her in the care of her older brothers. She spends the movie looking for her mother and finding herself along the way. However, she definitely struggles with trying to understand why her mother left. In addition, there is a fair amount of violence and the movie definitely earns its PG-13 rating. Therefore, it is probably most suitable for older kids and teens.

** Spoilers Could Be Ahead **

How Is This Relevant To Adoption & Foster Care?

There was much more relevance to foster-care/adoption than I had initially expected. The entire premise of the movie is that Enola’s mother, Eudoria, unexpectedly disappears on her 16^th birthday leaving her in the care of her older brothers. She spends the movie looking for her mother and finding herself along the way. She is eventually (temporarily) reunited with her mother who claims her leaving had nothing to do with not loving Enola, but rather because she was trying to give her a better life. This statement is likely to resonate with fostered and adopted children whose birth families gave them up for similar reasons.

Throughout the movie we get to witness a variety of very different caregiver relationships- both for Enola as well as her friend Tewkesbury. Enola starts out being raised by her mother and has a very close and loving relationship with her. Enola’s father died when she was young and both older brothers left but this doesn’t seem to affect them much, other than driving Enola and her mother even closer. However, despite their very positive relationship, Eudoria up and disappears. We learn later that this is because she was involved in a violent suffrage movement and wanted to protect Enola from that life but the way she goes about doing so is upsetting. Enola then is given into the care of her oldest brother, Mycroft, who thinks the best thing to do with her is sent her away to boarding school, which Enola objects to and instead runs away. It’s clear that he’s thinking about what’s best for his own interest, not Enola’s and he never even attempts to bond with her- seeing her as a problem to be solved rather than a child who needs a parent.

Enola eventually ends up at the boarding school briefly which turns out to be another dysfunctional caregiver relationship. The headmistress there slaps her for ‘talking back’ and keeps her locked in her room. She claims to have Enola’s best interests at heart, but given the time period the movie is set in that seems to be to force her to fit into a mold of what is expected of a young woman, rather than truly embracing Enola for who she is.  Finally, at the end of the movie Sherlock offers to take over as her guardian- a role Mycroft is all too happy to give up. Throughout the movie he seems to be the only adult who truly sees Enola and accepts her as she is. He finds ways to bond with her and to help her accomplish her own goals.

For children who have experienced trauma and been through foster care or adoption, chances are they have experienced one or more of these types of caregivers- whether it was a biological parent who gave them up so they could have a better/safer life, a restrictive group home, or caregivers who tried to force them to be someone they aren’t. They will likely relate to the struggles Enola goes through and the feelings she has about trying to gain control over her life when she feels like she doesn’t have any.

Discussion Points:

• Healthy vs. Unhealthy Caregiving Relationships
  One of the aspects of this movie I found to be interesting was the various different caregiving relationships we see depicted (both positive and negative). For children who have been through foster care or adoption they have experienced at least two (and likely many more) different caregiving relationships. Along with this comes confusion over how to fit in with different family/environment cultures and also often causes children to have difficulty in knowing what a healthy or unhealthy caregiver relationship looks like. Talking about the different relationships Enola has with the various caregivers in her life could be a great starting point for discussing what a healthy relationship looks like and how to know who to trust. Enola first lives with her mother and reports being incredibly happy. The two appear to have a close bond, though Enola does mention her mother ‘keeps secrets’ from her. This isn’t inherently bad, but as it turns out causes problems when these secrets lead her mother to abandon her. They are also very isolated from the rest of the world. Because all she had was her mom, no other family or friends, the sudden loss was even more difficult for her. Then Enola ends up in the care of her oldest brother, Mycroft, who seems to think she isn’t a ‘proper young woman’ and decides she needs to be ‘fixed’. He never asks or listens to what Enola’s needs or wants are and instead insists that he knows what is best for her. Enola even confronts him about this at one point- telling him that he is only thinking about what’s best for his own interests. His response to this is to scream at her that she’s his ward and needs to do as she’s told, causing her to cry. Another dysfunctional caregiving relationship we see is when Enola is sent to finishing school. Right off the bat Enola does not fit in and struggles to comply with the many new rules and expectations. While likely not quite to the extent of finishing school, many children who have been put into care struggle with similar feelings. They are taken out of an environment where they are comfortable and thrust into a new place, surrounded with new people and new rules and expectations of behavior which can lead to feelings of frustration as they attempt to fit in.Finally, we see a healthy relationship displayed in that of Sherlock- they he is not technically her legal guardian until the very end of the movie. He listens to Enola and offers her advice when she is struggling. There is one really great scene where Enola is upset, and Sherlock comes and sits near her and just starts talking. He doesn’t ask her questions or force the conversation but just sort of lets her know he’s there. She eventually does start talking about what’s bothering her and they being to connect. Later, he tells her how extraordinary she is and how much their mother loved her, even though she left. This comes at a low point for Enola when she really needed that reassurance and he is able to offer it to her. Talk with kids about these positive interactions and how they make him a good fit to be Enola’s guardian, as compared to the way the other adults (even her mother) interacted with her. Everyone spends the movie trying to make Enola into what they want her to be- whether that’s a feminist or a ‘proper young lady’. Sherlock is the only one how seems to really accept and embrace Enola for who she really is and encourages her to find her own path.
• Protecting Yourself vs. Protecting Others
  Enola shares a story about how when she was little she risked her life to rescue an injured lamb. Her mother gave her a hard time about, telling her that looking out for others is well and good, but not if it means sacrificing your own wellbeing. Enola struggles to live by these words but finds herself drawn to helping her friend Tewkesbury when he needs her- even though it repeatedly puts her life in danger. This can be a tough line to walk- how to know when to help others and how to know when we need to practice more self-care. Those who have experienced trauma are even more likely than others to have a warped sense of self-preservation. Some may feel like the world has never been a safe place for them and so they engage in frequent risky behavior because they figure their day-to-day life is risky anyway so why bother with being careful. Or it could swing the other way and they have had to be so focused on fight-or-flight and survival that it’s hardwired into them to always be on their guard and do whatever it takes to protect themselves, even if it hurts others. Of course, being too extreme in either direction can cause problems so this can be a good way to start a conversation about how to determine when to look out for yourself and when to help others.
• Dealing with Loss
  While Enola’s father is deceased at the start of the film, the bigger loss that impacts Enola during the movie is that of her mother- who is very much alive but who has chosen to leave her. In some ways, this can be an even more difficult loss for children to process because not only do they have to cope with the fact that their caregiver is no longer in their daily life but they also have to deal with the feelings of betrayal and rejection because the person they love is still alive but either can’t or doesn’t want to be with them. During the course of the movie we see Enola go through many different feelings related to his loss- from being in denial that her mother is really gone and not coming back, to being angry that she left and sad that she’s alone to eventually accepting that she’s been viewing her relationship with her mom through rose-colored glasses and while her mom clearly loved her and took care of her, their life together wasn’t perfect and even parents can make mistakes. She eventually sees her mom again and gets some closure- knowing that her mom is around but cannot take care of her anymore. Watching this journey Enola takes regarding her relationship with her mom may be helpful to children who have experienced a biological parent who left and is now in their life in a different capacity

Cautionary Points:

• Parent death
  Enola’s father is deceased at the start of the film. It’s not shown on screen only mentioned in passing- however it is done so somewhat cavalierly with a cartoon showing her father fall over and be replaced by a cross. Children who have suffered a recent parental loss might be upset at the casual manner in which it’s mentioned. Later, Tewkesbury also mentions that his father is dead.

• Parental abandonment
  Enola wakes up on the morning of her 16^th birthday to find that her mother has disappeared with no warning. Enola eventually finds some clues that lead her to a cryptic message and large sum of money but no real answers about where her mother has gone or why. Enola is left in the care of her older brother whom she has had no contact with since she was a young child. Enola eventually finds her mother who explains that she left to protect Enola and it wasn’t safe to tell her what was going on. She reassures Enola that it had nothing to with not loving her. The suddenness of her departure is likely to be upsetting to children who may have experienced similar abandonment and watching Enola spend most of the move wrestling with her feelings about this abandonment may not be particularly enjoyable.

• Child mistreatment
  Miss Harrison, the woman who runs the finishing school slaps Enola for talking back to her during their initial meeting. Later, when Enola misbehaves at school Miss Harrison keeps her locked in her room when she is not in class. This mistreatment may be upsetting to children who have experienced various forms of abuse or neglect.

• Running Away Glorified
  When Enola is told by her guardian, Mycroft, that she has to go to boarding school she decides instead to run away and search for her mother on her own. She meets up with Tewkesbury who has similarly decided to run away after he is unhappy with a decision his family has made about his future (wanting him to join the army). Later, Enola runs away again, this time from the boarding school. While they face a number of hardships while on the run, they also have a lot of adventures and seem to have an enjoyable time. Many children who have experienced trauma have poor impulse control and difficulty trusting adults. They also feel like they have very little control over their own life as many decisions about where and with whom they will live are made for them. Because of this, running away often seems like a viable option and they may feel that living on their own is preferable to whatever situation they were in. Watching likeable characters make these same choices, and be successful, may encourage this line of thinking/behavior.

• Drowning/Water Torture
  There’s a scene where the assassin catches up with Enola. He essentially waterboards her trying to get information about the location of her friend, Tewksbury- repeatedly holding her head under the water while she struggles. When he realizes she has no information he apparently decides to kill her and holds her head under the water to do so. Enola ends up pretending he has succeeded and lets her body go limp so he’ll let go and she can fight back. However, for a brief moment it appears that he was successful in killing her. Most of this scene is shown in close-ups of Enola’s face as she struggles underwater and is somewhat disturbing- especially for children who may have experienced abuse or trauma related to water/drowning.

• Stalking/Being Followed
  Throughout the movie The Man in the Bowler Hat, a hired assassin, is following Tewkesbury (and by extension, Enola). We see him catch up to them in several violent confrontations. There is also a scene where the kids are in their boarding room and we see a suspenseful shot of a hand coming around the door before he attacks. Thankfully, Enola saw this coming and was ready to fight, but it was a visually creepy scene, especially for children who have been stalked/followed by an abuser or have fears of this happening.

• Violence
  For most of the movie the violence is fairly moderate. Enola is trained in martial arts and we see her engage in this both with friends and enemies at times, but the confrontations are generally short and not particularly violent. There is a scene where the assassin stabs her with a knife, but she is protected by her corset. Another scene has him attempting to throw Tewkesbury off a moving train. There are also a few scenes with fireworks/explosives.  However, the biggest offender is in the movie’s final act: we see Enola and Tewkesbury decide to confront his family about why they hired someone to kill him. This leads to a confrontation with the assassin and a rather violent struggle- first with Enola who is knocked to the ground and bleeding from a head injury. Then the assassin attempts to strangle Tewksbury in another violent struggle. Enola comes to his rescue and eventually ends up knocking the assassin to the ground where his head collides with a sharp stone and we see more blood and it turns out he has been killed. Then The Dowager shoots Tewksbury with a rifle and he falls down, presumably dead. This all takes place in the span of about 10 minutes but it very action-packed and fairly disturbing given the close-up shots of both Enola and the assassin’s head injuries.

• Moderate-to-Intense Peril
  There are several times we think a character has died. One of Enola’s self-defense strategies is sometimes to feign death in order to get the upper hand. We see this when the assassin tried to drown her- Enola goes limp and appears dead. Then once he lets go of her she attacks. Later we see Enola suffer an extreme head injury and Tewkesbury shot in the chest. They both manage to survive but there are seconds or (in the latter case) minutes where we do not know if the character is going to be okay. For children who have experienced great loss or trauma, this unsettling feeling of not knowing if someone is going to be alright can be extremely difficult and upsetting to experience.
• Family Betrayal
  Throughout the movie an assassin is following Tewkesbury, and he and Enola try to figure out who hired this man to try and kill him. It turns out that Tewkesbury’s extended family wants him dead so they can take over his spot in the House of Lords. This starts as his uncle hiring an assassin and when that fails, his grandmother decides to do it herself and shoots him with the intent to kill (and we believe him to be dead for a few minutes). For children who have been abused or threatened by their caregivers, watching the grandmother shoot her grandson may reflect their own fears about similar events or bring up traumatic memories. For many children, the worst part of the neglect or abuse is realizing that the people who were supposed to love and care for you the most…don’t. This often leads to trust issue as they have learned to think that their caregivers are there to harm rather than protect them. For Tewkesbury this is proven very true as shown by the fact that his uncle wants him killed and his grandmother even shoots him. This may reinforce the idea that families and caregivers cannot be trusted.

Discussion Guide:

1. How do you think Enola feels when she finds that her mother left? How does she react?
   Caregiver Note: This may be a somewhat triggering questions, but it’s such an integral part of the movie that it’s important to discuss. The opening of the movie showed the special bond Enola and her mom seem to have to it’s extra surprising for Enola to find her gone with no warning. To add injury to insult, it’s her birthday. Her mom did think to leave her a gift but Enola questions it saying, “We were happy, weren’t we? Shouldn’t she have given me these presents herself?”. Enola is clearly expressing that some part of her is upset, though she also doesn’t outwardly express it as we would expect (there are no tears, no yelling). Instead she seems to throw herself into the mystery of finding her mother and also states that her brothers are coming and she’s certain they’ll have the answers. As children discuss Enola’s reactions and feelings it may also provide insight into their own situations and maybe how they handled a similar situation if they experienced it. Enola’s feelings about this event seem to change throughout the movie and we see her cycle through denial, anger, sadness, curiosity and eventually acceptance. This can provide a great backdrop for discussing the different stages of grief and the way our emotions can change over time – one day they might be sad about something that happened and the next day angry or even happy about it, and that’s okay!
2. Enola seems almost proud of the fact that her name spelled backwards means ‘alone’ and proclaims that she doesn’t need friends and is just fine on her own. Do you think this is true? How does her view on this matter change throughout the movie?
   Caregiver Note: Enola has grown up being taught to rely only on herself and has led a very sheltered life- living with just her mother and they seemed to have almost no contact with the outside world. Because of this Enola is very independent, which isn’t a bad quality. However, no one can really manage 100% alone and everyone needs companionship in some capacity. Enola comes to realize this as she befriends Tewkesbury, despite her initial desire to be on her own. She comes to find that she is more successful when she has someone else on her side- whether it’s Tewkesbury or her brother Sherlock. Children who have been through trauma may relate to Enola here- they may not have a lot of close friends or family and have learned through experience that they can’t really trust or rely on anyone else to help them because they have been let down in the past. Talking about how Enola realizes she needs others around her may help children realize that it’s okay for them to accept help and companionship as well.
3. Activity: Pinecone Friends
   Caregiver Note: Sherlock tells Enola a story about a pinecone dog she made when she was little and was very attached to. Later, this toy is used as a means of communication between Enola and her brother to symbolize that they are watching and are around. This can be a fun activity, especially for younger kids. Using basic craft materials (googly eyes, paint, felt, etc.) make your own pinecone animals. Then, talk about how you can use these as a signal the way Enola and Sherlock did- maybe you leave your pinecone animal in their lunchbox or on their bed as a way or saying ‘hey I just wanted to let you know I was thinking about you and I’m here’. Or they could leave their animal in a designated spot to indicate that maybe they want to talk to you or need some extra attention. This functions on two levels- children with a background of trauma may struggle with articulating their feelings or communicating their needs. But if they have a nonverbal symbol like this, they can use it to let you know they’re having a hard time without having to find the words to express that. And they also may not be comfortable with verbal praise or normal affection like a hug. So, having this as an alternative way for you to express that you care for them and are listening may be a safe alternative way to express your feelings for them in a way they are able to process.
4. The first time Sherlock and Enola really sit down and have a serious conversation she admits she’s angry with him and wants to know why he left and did not stay in contact with her. What were his reasons? Do you think she’s right to be angry?
   Caregiver Note: Sherlock explains that it was hard for him to be in that house after their father died. He also says that he thought Enola was better off without him and that she didn’t seem to really mind one way or the other. Enola explains to him that she did remember and care about him and as proof has saved every single newspaper article about him. Both characters have a right to feel the way they do- Enola lost her father too and her brothers just left and never came back. At the time it wasn’t as big of a deal because she had her mother, but now that her mother’s left her as well she’s wishing she knew her brother better. It also now seems more like a pattern- that the people who are supposed to care about her just leave. First her brothers, then her mom. Children who have been through foster care or adoption may feel the same way. For whatever reason they are no longer with their biological parents and some have also been through multiple placements. It can be easy to start to feel like you’re the problem and no one wants you.
5. When Enola is talking to Tewkesbury he shows her sympathy for her situation but rather than comforting her, she gets angry. Why?
   Caregiver Note: Enola gets angry because she feels like he’s feeling sorry for and doesn’t want his pity. However Tewkesbury reminds her that he’s experienced similar things (his family sending him away) and that he understands and empathizes with her, rather than feeling sorry for her. Children who have experienced trauma are no stranger to pity. Everyone talks about ‘the poor foster kid’ and how terrible their life must have been, and it gets old fast. No one wants people to feel sorry for them all the time- they just want to be treated like a ‘normal’ kid. However, they have been through extreme circumstances and it can be comforting to have someone who truly understands and empathizes with their situation. This can be a fine line to walk, however, and something you think of as showing empathy may come across as pity to them. Having a conversation about  the difference between these two things and how your kids would best like you to comfort them can help you become a better caregiver.
6. Activity: Cryptograms
   Caregiver Note: Enola loves solving puzzles and mysteries, like her older brother Sherlock. She and her mother leave each other messages in code throughout the movie. A fun activity to do together would be to create your own secret coded messages! A cryptogram is one type of puzzle shown in the movie- where each letter is replaced with a certain other letter or number (1=a, 2=b, etc.). This can be as simple or complicated as you want to make it, dependent on the age and cognitive level of the kids involved. So come up with your own code! Post a reference sheet somewhere (like the refrigerator) and then you can leave each other secret messages using the code!
7. When Enola is sent to finishing school, she struggles to fit in with the others and adjust to her new environment. How do you think that makes her feel? Have you ever had a similar experience?
   Caregiver Note: Foster care and adoption inherently involves leaving one environment and being put in a new one. Every family or residential facility is different and has different rules and behavioral norms. Enola was brought up in a home with just her and her mother- and her mother rejected typical societal values, especially regarding the role of women. Enola had enormous freedom and was taught to be unique and a little ‘wild’. When she is placed at a finishing school she is thrown into an entirely different world- one where she must follow new rules and expectations and she struggles. She’s also the ‘new kid on the block’ and doesn’t relate well to her peers, causing her to be further ostracized. Children who were put into a new placement may relate a lot to the way Enola feels during this sequence. Their new foster of adoptive placement may be completely different than what they’re used to. They may also have to get used to new routines and new people and this can lead to them feeling very alone and outcast. Talking about Enola’s struggles may offer some insight into how they feel about their own adjustment to a new home.
8. Sherlock tells Enola that mom always found her extraordinary and he does too. How does that make her feel?
   Caregiver Note: This is part of a conversation between Sherlock and Enola when he visits her at finishing school. Enola is at a very low point- she’s struggling to fit in to a culture that she doesn’t want to be a part of and feeling very alone. And Miss Harrison keeps telling her that her mother abandoned her and doesn’t care for her and Enola is starting to wonder if that’s true. Sherlock telling her this about how much her mother cared for her helps her find the strength she needs to keep fighting. This is also the first time that he admits that he also cares about her. While his actions have demonstrated this, sometimes we need to actually hear the words- especially for children who have been through trauma and may not be able to recognize more subtle displays of affection.
9. Who do you think is best caregiver for Enola? Why?
   Caregiver Note: As mentioned in the discussion section, Enola goes through a number of caregivers in the movie- her mother, Mycroft, Miss Harrison, and eventually Sherlock. Sherlock is arguably the best choice as he really tries to connect with Enola in a way that works for her. And he truly seems to listen to her and have her best interests at heart. He is the only one who really sees and accepts Enola for who she is and isn’t trying to make her be something else. Some children may also say her mom- and Eudoria was a mostly positive figure in Enola’s life (up until she abandoned her with no warning). The important thing here isn’t necessarily getting the ‘right’ answer but discussing what makes someone a good caregiver and to help youth recognize those who fill that role in their own lives.
10.  At the end of the movie Enola is finally reunited with her mother, at least briefly, and it elicits a wealth of emotions for her. Do you think she has forgiven her mother for leaving her? Do you agree with her choice?
    Caregiver Note: Enola at first seems angry when her mother appears, then sad, and eventually seems to forgive her and embraces her at the end. This is an accelerated version of what foster and adoptive kids may experience if/when they reunite with their birth parents in some capacity. It usually doesn’t happen in a three-minute span but given the storytelling medium it understandably has to happen a little faster here.  These (and any other) emotions are all valid and sometimes all occur at the same time making processing the feelings difficult and confusing. But it’s possible to be angry at someone for leaving, sad because you missed them AND happy to see them again, all at the same time. The most important thing here is to talk about the feelings, whatever they are. They way children respond to this question may reflect where on their own journey they are.  Some will feel that Enola could forgive her because she knew that her mother wanted what was best for her and still loves her, even if they aren’t together. Others will feel like Enola should continue to be angry at her mother for leaving.