Discussion Guide:

1. Why are Raya, Boun, Little Noi, and Tong alone? What happened to their families and villages?
   Caregiver Note: This is an introductory question to help start the discussion with your child about the subject of grief and loss. Children develop within the contexts of relationships as humans are social beings. If children do not have secure attachments with bigger, stronger, kinder, wise caregivers they may miss out on emotional and cognitive growth opportunities, which may contribute to your child’s struggles to connect feelings to behaviors. Your child may recognize that each of these characters have lost parents, siblings, and neighbors, but they may not connect that they each react to these losses and express grief differently.
2. How do Raya, Boun, Little Noi, and Tong act differently after they have lost their loved ones? How are they acting alike?
   Caregiver Note: This is a question that will continue to ease the conversation into talking about themselves. It’s much easier to see someone else’s struggles more so than our own and children are no different. Help your child connect how Raya keeps others at an emotional distance and struggles to express how she feels, how Boun has become self-sufficient and stays busy to not think about loss, how Little Noi has found a new “family” in her animal companions, and Tong remains isolated in his grief. Your child may also pick up on other patterns that you didn’t notice, and if that is the case that is great! Your child is building social and emotional intelligence!
3. How have you felt before when you were far away from someone you loved? What helps when you miss them the most?
   Caregiver Note: This question brings the subject to your child’s sense of grief and loss. Now that we have connected with the characters’ emotions we can start to connect your child to their own feelings of grief and loss after the practice with Raya and her companions. Depending on the depth of your relationship and your child’s comfort level this question may be difficult for them to talk about. If your child resists talking about this too much, it’s best to not force it and allow them to talk as in depth as they wish. Coming up with a plan together for how they can be comforted when they are so sad or angry that words (which are processed in the prefrontal cortex, the same area of the brain where emotional regulation is housed and is often underdeveloped in children with trauma) are hard you can work together as a team with the grief instead of having caregiver squared off against the child and their behaviors.
4. ACTIVITY: Kumandra Dragon Puzzle
   Caregiver Note: Chief Benja says in the start of the film that he believes that Tail, Talon, Spine, Fang, and Heart can be Kumandra again but that someone has to take the first step. So while you and your child discuss the movie, let’s take that step!
   
   For this activity you will need a rectangular piece of cardboard that will be big enough to hold your puzzle’s picture but easy to cut, scissors, a black marker, and colored markers to draw all sorts of landmarks. The adult may need to help the child depending on their age.
   
   Help your child draw the figure of a dragon centered on the cardboard. They will need to spread out areas that will represent the Tail, Talons (maybe of one particular foot), Spine, Fang, and Heart. Decorate your regions with all the different plant and geographic features your child wishes that you may then color in. Then, take your black marker and decorate a map border for the edges and boundaries for the different areas. Cut the area boundary lines and you and your child will have your very own Kumandra map puzzle!
   
   For an extra step you can put clear packing tape over the parts before coloring the details and use dry erase markers to give Kumandra all sorts of looks and color combinations several times!
5. Why do Raya and Tong have so much misinformation about the other villages’ cultures and habits?
   Caregiver Note: It is very clear that even before Namaari’s betrayal of Raya that each of the villages of Kumandra have strong, often negative stereotypes that are heavily held after the Druun breaks out of Sisu’s seal. I can relate to this very much as someone that grew up in two areas of the United States of America that often get some heavily hurtful stereotypes: the South and Appalachia. Usually when those terms are heard visions of hillbillies, Scarlett O’Hara, and other troupes come up fairly quickly. These stereotypes are so pervasive that many of my peers (including myself) were pressured to “drop” our accents in favor of a more neutral accent to improve our ability to get jobs and better education opportunities. This is because the accents of these regions are stereotypically that of someone “ignorant” or “uneducated”. In reality, our language use and accents in these areas are quite diverse and the people that speak these dialects are far from unintelligent. There are many areas in which stereotypes can breed harmful biases between people groups whether they be regional (like in Raya and the Last Dragon (2021) ), racial, gender-based, or of any other cultural component. It is important that we learn to identify our biases and learn from them rather than pretend they don’t exist entirely as this can influence our ability to coexist with others.
   
   Your child may notice that other villagers talked about these stereotypes, leaders acted upon these stereotypes, and that different regions taught historical events with different biases and narratives to defend actions.
6. What helped Raya, Tong, and the others learn to get along with one another? What helped them learn to get along with Namaari and the other residents of Fang?
   Caregiver Note: The longer Raya and the others spent time together, the more they each realized that what they had heard was not always true. Raya and her companions slowly learned that a stereotype can be a harmful generalization to apply to a future friend and comrade. After breaking down barriers amongst one another, and learning a lesson in trust from Sisu, Raya was able to make the “first step” in helping mend the relationship the other regions had with Fang, which ultimately saved the world and even brought back the Dragons! The impossible can happen when we learn to truly see our neighbors as future friends and allies rather than waiting for the next enemy to appear.
7. Why does Raya always distrust everyone so much? Have you ever felt like Raya where it feels like you can’t trust anyone?
   Caregiver Note: The next few questions will help your child connect their emotions to survival behaviors using Raya and Sisu as case studies or examples. Children that have endured trauma will often develop safety mechanisms such as survival behaviors to keep themselves safe in the absence of a bigger, stronger, wiser caregiver. With that in mind, after Raya loses her father because of Namaari’s betrayal it makes sense that Raya doesn’t trust others easily. However, outside of Raya’s conflict with Namaari and Fang this has the consequence of emotional distance from everyone and being unable to trust others, like well-meaning Sisu, to carry out important tasks. Help your child connect this concept before moving on to Sisu.
8. Why does Sisu trust and believe everyone without a second thought? Why does Sisu trust others more than Raya?
   Caregiver Note: While we meet Raya as a child and then as a young adult consumed by grief and trauma, Sisu appears to have had a very close, loving relationship with her siblings and to have much more in terms of age and experience when they sacrificed themselves for Sisu to seal Druun. Then, Sisu slept for a couple of hundred years. Sisu reacts very differently due to her experiences of being able to trust her Dragon companions for a long time and this translates to how she so easily trusts others in comparison to Raya. Now, Sisu’s trust for others isn’t perfect in that she is tricked easily by others but Sisu is also open to new relationships with no expectations. It’s important for a caregiver to
   remember that though two children may go through similar traumatic experiences (i.e. – losing family members) each child comes with different experiences, developmental ages, and levels of resilience in the face of trauma. As a result, you can see large differences in trauma reactivity in even sibling groups! For this reason a caregiver should be prepared to adjust their parenting and word-choices to help meet children where they are at, much like how Sisu continued to meet her companions where they were in terms of trust whether it was easy as with Namaari or difficult as with Raya.
9. Are there times where it’s harder for you to trust others like Raya? Are there times where you trust too easily like Sisu? How can I help you find a good balance with trusting others?
   Caregiver Note: Here is where you and your child can work together as a team to tackle communication about struggles before they arise. This can be a time to discuss how to identify safe adults vs. unsafe adults or decide if a peer is a good friend vs. best friend. Allow your child to lead the level of depth in this conversation though and be prepared to listen more. Using their words to describe what they think and feel with a safe adult will help those brains develop and learn the valuable life skill of identifying friends.
10. ACTIVITY: Kumandra Soup by Malika Lim Eubank
    Caregiver Note: I don’t know about you, but when I watched this movie I really wanted to try to figure out this soup. I wasn’t very familiar with some of the ingredients mentioned in the movie (like shrimp paste from Tail or palm sugar from Heart)  so I naturally looked up a few suggestion recipes and loved how fun Malika makes this yummy experience. One idea for this experience is to work with your children through the preparation work and cooking of this dish while discussing the movie. You can also talk while giving this a try. Of course, you can make substitutions as needed but these are the main ingredients from the movie: shrimp paste from Tail, lemongrass from Talon, bamboo shoots from Spine, chilis from Fang, and palm sugar from Heart. Don’t be too intimidated by the chilis, several chili varieties are more flavorful than “hot” so that’s an easy ingredient to substitute based on your preferences if Thai chilis are too much.
    
    Below is the written recipe as well as a YouTube tutorial with Malika Lim Eubank.
    
    KUMANDRA SOUP – Malika Lim Eubank – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=73gNDqgQpJU
    
    In honor of the release of Disney’s Raya and the Last Dragon, Malika shows you how to recreate the soup featured in the movie. It’s a perfect meal for the whole family while you enjoy the film on Disney Plus.

INGREDIENTS

• 6 Cups: Chicken Broth 
• 1 lb. Uncooked shrimp (use peeled and deveined shrimp if you are in a hurry or use 20 head on jumbo shrimp for extra flavor)
• 1 package of mild mushrooms (I used 3.5 oz package of Beech Mushrooms)
• 1-2 limes
• 1/4 cup fish sauce
• 1 bunch cilantro
• 1 in piece of galanga (aka Siamese Ginger) 
• 1/2 c coconut cream (optional)
• 1 tablespoon shrimp paste
• 2 large stalks lemongrass 
• 1 c bamboo shoots
• 5 Thai chilis sliced on the bias 
• 1 tsp palm sugar

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Heat chicken broth to a boil over high heat.
2. SKIP this step if using head-on shrimp. Otherwise, remove shrimp heads, peel and devein adding the heads and shells to the broth as it comes to a boil. Once all the heads are all in the pot, use the back of a spoon or spatula to press the heads against the pot to encourage the release of all that wonderful flavor.
3. Now bruise the 2 lemongrass stalks and cut them in half. Cut the bottom half (white portion) into large 3 in long pieces and add to the broth. 
4. Slice the galanga root into thin slices approx 1/8 in and add to the broth. 
5. Break off the stems of the cilantro and add the stems to the broth.
6. Prepare the rest of the ingredients. Clean and separate the mushrooms. Slice bamboo shoots into rounds about 1/8 in thick. Slice the chilis on the bias, slice the remaining lemongrass pieces, slice lime for squeezing, crush palm sugar, remove about 2tbsp of leaves from cilantro.
7. Use a slotted spoon or skimmer to remove the lemongrass, galanga, cilantro stems and shrimp heads and shells from the broth. 
8. Add the mushrooms and shrimps to the broth and cook till almost done (about 7 minutes for jumbo shrimp).
9. Add half of the cilantro leaves (about 1 tbsp).
10. Now is the time to recreate the scene from Raya! Add shrimp paste, lemongrass, sliced bamboo shoots, sliced chilis and palm sugar. 
11. Finish the soup with lime juice and fish sauce to taste. I used about 1/4 cup fish sauce and juice from 1 lime.
12. Garnish bowl with additional sliced chilis, the rest of cilantro leaves and a dollop of coconut cream. Serve with jasmine rice.

[Donate to this Project]

NOTE: Inclusion on these lists does not necessarily mean endorsement. Furthermore, with all our resources, we highly recommend you preview them first to determine if there are any trauma triggers that your child may not be ready to handle. Transfiguring Adoption does not intend for its reviewers nor its reviews to be professional, medical or legal advice. These reviews and discussion guides are intended to help parents to better be able to connect and understand their children who come from traumatic backgrounds.