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ADOPTING: real life stories – Adoption Book Review

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From the Cover of ADOPTING: real life stories by Ann Morris:

“Who makes adoption a success? We do: the kids and parents in the new family as we change shape to accommodate each other.

With more than 70 real life stories, revealing moments of vulnerability and moments of joy, this book provides an authentic insight into adoption. These stories take the reader on a journey through every stage of the adoption process, from making the decision to adopt to the challenges of bringing up a child who has lost all trust in the adult world, offering informative, honest and often emotive accounts of families’ experiences. It includes the stories of adopters, adoptees and birth parents. Chapters cover every aspect of adoption: adopting older children to adopting sibling groups; adopting as a single parent; adopting as a same-sex couple; adopting emotionally and physically abused children; the nightmare of adoption breaking down; contact with birth parents; tracing and social media and much more.”


Grade:

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Transfiguring Adoption awarded this book 4 Hoots out of 5 based on how useful it will be for a foster/adoptive family. [Learn more about our Hoot grading system here]


What I Thought:

This book is a collection of stories as well as general information on adoption, specifically pertaining to adoption in the UK. The stories are organized in great fashion, surrounding different topics in the adoption and foster care community. The book begins with “So you want to adopt?” as the first chapter and has quite a bit of good intro info as well as stories to support the topic. Th book progresses through the topics of the first meetings, ages of the children at time of placement and how that might look, to different types of abilities as well as trauma. The topics covered next are about different types of parents ( same sex and single parent adoption). As well as additional adoptions in the same families. The following chapters cover more controversial topics of race/religion as it relates to adoption as well as the difficult subjects of school, future contact with biological parents and children, attachment issues, behaviors, helping the adoptive children know there story, social media and adoption, and concluding the book with a birth mother’s story.

What makes this book a stand out are all of the years and years of personal stories that are shared throughout the book to help the reader fully understand how each topic relates specifically to adoption and what it might look like in the real world. I personally appreciated a book like this on the market to help paint a more realistic picture of how adoption looks in real life. One of my favorite parts of the book was the Adoption UK’s ten-point guide to handling teenagers. It was a more how to/step by step guide to follow and apply for parents, (not just what to do with your children but also how to help yourself while parenting). Additionally, the chapter entitled, “Taking in the Child, Taking on the School” was incredible. It really paints a clear picture of how important finding the right school for the child is, as far as how to best help with trauma and trust. There are many tips and ideas on how to specifically help your child when in comes to the school setting. Another very informative chapter is called “Breakdown”. This chapter discusses adoption disruptions and has some statistics as well as in depth information about what an adoption disruption looks like. I appreciated this chapter being in this book as the social stigma for adoption disruptions appears to be so negative. The book does a great job of explaining the truth as to why they occur as well as what that looks like, with personal stories from adoptive families. Overall, this book is a easy read, that you could pick up and get some great take away’s from for your adoption journey or if your just considering an adoption.


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